so, Lorraine, a charming princess, was admired by all throughout the land. Fashions were made and destroyed by what she chose to wear and lives were saved or lost by her very word.
However there was a danger in the land, a dark evil out in the furthest forest. The people of the land were most fearful and some nights the entire land, man and beast, would lay awake, petrified by the horrible sounds from the furthest forest. Soon fear turned to a desire that something be done. They all looked to Lorraine for knowledge on what to do. Lorraine pondered for a while and decreed that the bravest of all fighters should go into the dangerous forests and destroy the great evil. There were many volunteers, for all wanted to impress Lorraine. The crowds gathered to cheer on these brave warriors as they set forth on the journey. Everyone was pleased and excited. Days and then weeks passed and still though there was the sound of evil from those dark forests. The people again grew fearful, for themselves and those that had dared the perilous journey. Again they looked to Lorraine for guidance. Princess Lorraine decreed that animals should be sent out to the forests to appease the evil. This did not work and now the people were without some of their best animals. So Princess Lorraine reluctantly says they must sacrifice the children, there was little argument, for all wanted to please the princess and the children were right snotty little toerags that did little but eat and play Playstation. Still though the fearful sounds continued and all without sight nor sound from those that had ventured into those evil forests.
Despair was everywhere. So Lorraine said Mick, the most cowardly of all the men in the lands should go and find out what had happened. Despair lifted cos Mick had some terrible jokes and most agreed he looked like something you expect to find in a stagnant pond. Mick jumped when he was called forward. And again several times in fact. However such was Lorraine's prescience that he could not turn down the command. So poor Mick went out to the forest. Several noises made him jump along the way, but no harm befell him, Finally Mick reached the centre of the forest where the abhorrent sounds emanated. There he found several large speakers and some students from the University of Brunel. Turned out it was all part of an experiment by the University.
